Confidence is a confusing word, so I should first be clear about what I mean. It seems to me that most people use the term confidence to refer to some kind of elevated feeling state. Whether it’s a little extra spark or something more grandiose, the popular use of confidence implies that we need a heightened mood in order to perform well, succeed in life, or even to just be ourselves.

From this perspective, confidence is overrated.

Of course, feeling confident feels awesome. And yes, when you have it, use it and build off the momentum. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s true, the feeling of confidence is great at overriding stress, doubt, and anxiety for a while. But only for a while. The problem is when the momentum runs out, and other feeling states move in. What do you do then?

Confidence is fickle. Some days you wake up with it. Others not so much. If we over-rely on it, we run the risk of becoming mood dependent. When we feel good, we do good. When we don’t, we get caught up in our head, check out, and come up with excuses.

I have good news though. There are better models for human performance. Instead of feeling confident, I prefer to look at preparation and perseverance as the more important components.

Let’s start with preparation. Unlike confidence, you can’t really fake it. I mean, you can lie about it, but deep down you either know you’ve done the work or not. If you can say with honesty “I’m prepared,” it doesn’t matter so much whether you feel confident.

A genuine belief in one’s preparation turns into self-trust. And trust is earned, not given. Self-trust is deep. It transcends the realm of surface feelings. Feeling confident, unconfident, anxious, doubtful, pumped up? Doesn’t matter. You’re prepared, and you deserve to trust yourself. That’s what really counts.

This may sound like a strange idea: It’s possible to still trust yourself while feeling unconfident. Think about it. What does “feeling unconfident” actually refer to? Isn’t it just an interpretation of some form of nervous system activity? A jittery wave of bodily energy, perhaps?  You don’t necessarily have control over this feeling, but you do have control over whether you assign importance to it.

Waves of energy don’t have to mean anything at all. Feeling states come and go. But self-trust can be the solid ground from which you operate.

Now the other piece to the puzzle: Perseverance. You ever heard that Mike Tyson quote? Something like, “Everyone has a gameplan until they get punched in the face.” That’s life. You know you’re prepared, but life punches you in the face sometimes. This has happened before, and it will happen again.

In boxing, there is a phrase used to describe a fighter that can take a punch. “He has a good chin,” they say. Perseverance is gritty like that, and it builds self-trust too. Every time you persist through something hard, you’re providing yourself with evidence that you can take a punch—that you have a good chin.  

When you commit to perseverance, you stay in it. You keep giving yourself a chance until all reasonable options have been exhausted. Maybe you get off to a choppy start, maybe something unexpected happens, maybe the sky falls. Regardless, perseverance helps us navigate those aspects of life that we can’t prepare for. It gives us a way through the chaos.

To conclude, if you focus on preparation and perseverance, you’re working with something far more reliable than confidence. As you very well know, confidence may no-show. But no worries. Preparation gives you the ground to stand on. Perseverance keeps you moving forward. And together, they form a foundation you can trust.